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Notes From A Polite New Yorker

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Notes From a Polite New Yorker: Sid Yiddish for President

His platform includes heavy support of the arts. He would also buy everyone a new pair of shoes and hand out bubble gum with good comics in them, not the shabby comics that have become the standard today.
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Notes From A Polite New Yorker: Happily Out of the Pop Culture Loop

I am glad that I'm out of touch on these things and out of the loop, and not because today's pop culture is all crap and the pop culture of my time was so much better. ...
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Notes From A Polite New Yorker: Daily Life With Neither Fear Nor Apology

Let's observe a moment of silence for the victims of these horrors, but don't dare be silenced by fear....
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Notes From A Polite New Yorker: Just Another Weekday Explosion in New York City

Was there a burning vehicle? Did someone detonate a car bomb in our neighborhood? Was there a meth lab in someone's apartment that caught fire and now toxic chemicals are in the air? ...
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Notes From A Polite New Yorker: Two Presidential Campaigns, One City

New York loves a big media circus, but America can do better. ...
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Notes From A Polite New Yorker: Topless Women Are Not New York's Problem

The idea that's been circulated by the mayor is to demolish the Times Square pedestrian plaza is lunacy. ...
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Notes From A Polite New Yorker: Brooklyn's Rapid Cultural Death Claims Two More

Brooklyn stopped being an "up and coming" borough nearly 10 years ago. It's now an overrated playground for the wealthy and clueless....
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Notes From A Polite New Yorker: Jump Off the Tranny Bandwagon

If we tell our transgendered friends that their problems can be solved with hormone treatments and surgery, we're not being truthful. ...
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Notes From A Polite New Yorker: New York Means Expected Excellence

New Yorkers tolerate long commutes not because we are suckers for punishment, but because New York is worth it....
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Notes From A Polite New Yorker: I Want To Be Poet Laureate of Queens

Queens continues to inspire me to write poetry. Queens is my home and it's where I believe you find the most New York part of New York....
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Notes From A Polite New Yorker: Surviving One Year as a Parent

Way too many parents think that the fact that they've reproduced puts them on some higher moral plane. ...
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Notes From A Polite New Yorker: Nous Sommes Charlie

It is right to be intolerant of any ideology that feels justified treading on the freedoms of others....
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Notes From A Polite New Yorker: Kindness Isn't Just for Women and Sissies

Don't be afraid to be kind in fear of it rendering you soft or foolish....
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Notes From A Polite New Yorker: Time in the Woods

Hunting is a noble venture, and it requires a lot of patience and discipline....
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Notes From A Polite New Yorker: Loss of Laughter and Singing - RIP Lizzy O'Donnell

In the midst of this tremendous loss, I was reminded of how lucky I am to have had an aunt like Liz, but also how lucky I am to come from a family that produces such people. ...
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Notes From A Polite New Yorker: Best NYC Celebrity Encounter Ever - Geoffrey Holder

I had plenty of celebrities pass through my line at JFK Airport, but by far and away the best was the actor Geoffrey Holder. ...
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Notes From A Polite New Yorker: New York Has Beach Bums and Boat People

You can find some interesting seaside life right here within the five boroughs....
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Notes From A Polite New Yorker: Labor's Love Lost

I dream of the day when the outsourcing C.E.O. gets a brick through his living room window and four flat tires on his way to work....
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Notes From A Polite New Yorker: Great New Yorkers - My Grandmother

You would be hard pressed to meet a better person in all of the world. Go ahead and try....
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Notes From A Polite New Yorker: Gentrification Nation

Gentrification is integration that you don't like. Integration is gentrification that benefits you. ...
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Notes From A Polite New Yorker: Making Babies for Fun and Posterity

The one adventure that still terrified the shit out of me was having kids, but I could put it off no longer. ...
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Notes From A Polite New Yorker: Legalize It, Then Criticize It...

We are not far from the prohibition of marijuana being as antiquated and ridiculous as the prohibition against alcohol that started almost 100 years ago....
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Notes From A Polite New Yorker: A-Hunting You Should Go

If you're willing to eat it, you should be willing to kill it....
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Notes From A Polite New Yorker: A Night at White Castle

White Castle holds a unique place in the sphere of American fast food....
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Notes From A Polite New Yorker: Atheist Church

The atheist church is an illustration of the spineless nature of our times....
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Notes From A Polite New Yorker: Cyclist Jerks from Hell

Just because you can do less damage with a bicycle doesn't excuse you from riding it recklessly, and the Big Apple is sick with reckless cyclists....
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Notes From A Polite New Yorker: Kosher Pedophilia, NYC Approved

New York mayoral candidates agree: It's OK to suck a baby's penis. ...
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Notes From A Polite New Yorker: The Cold Harsh Light of City Lights

The current guardians of our culture's literary estate need to have their throats cut....
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Notes From A Polite New Yorker: How to Go Crazy Properly

Most of us lose our minds at one point or another, but almost always too slowly to register to the outside world....
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Notes From A Polite New Yorker: The Great Immigration Scam

The truth is an amnesty plan will be bad for everyone but the wealthiest among us. ...
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Notes From A Polite New Yorker: Getting More Women Killed For "Progress"

I don't oppose putting women in combat because I believe women are incapable, I oppose sending women into combat because I believe in civilization. ...
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Notes From A Polite New Yorker: Loving Our Guns with Common Sense

Pro and anti-gun forces agree: way too many of the wrong people have easy access to guns, and something must be done about that. ...
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Notes From A Polite New Yorker: The Other Side of the "Demographic Dilemma"

The demographic argument is the one that is the most one-sided and simplistic, and fails to look at the entire picture of racial politics. ...
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Notes From A Polite New Yorker: The Brooklyn Nets Deserve to Fail

Never was there a more perfect illustration of government corruption, crony capitalism, racial pandering and ugly architecture in these five boroughs. ...
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Notes From A Polite New Yorker: A Glitch in Time

Technology is a wonderful thing, but it has helped neuter us as a people. ...
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Notes From A Polite New Yorker: Legalize Prostitution Already

Want to find the nearest hooker that's certified disease-free and fits your budget? There will be an app for that. ...
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Notes From A Polite New Yorker: The Call of the American Road

Sure, one can ride the rails and see a good bit of America that way, but a car gives you the power of self determination and destiny that Americans habitually crave....
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Notes from a Polite New Yorker: Groupthink and Unfashionable Facts

The Trayvon Martin tragedy has sparked racial hysteria and groupthink typical of mainstream media....
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Notes From a Polite New Yorker: Multiculturalism as 21st Century McCarthyism

If you refuse to listen to opposing points of view, you risk turning your head into a useless echo chamber....
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Notes from a Polite New Yorker: Riding the Bus Like a Schmuck

No one would rightfully choose to take a bus when they can take a subway instead....
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Notes from a Polite New Yorker: A Final Farewell to ZAK

You could say that the arrangements of ZAK's final resting place were made in PRT, or Punk Rock Time. ...
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Notes from a Polite New Yorker: Commemorating September 11th, the Non-Bullshit Way

The Tunnel to Towers Run is a way to honor the heroes of September 11th, 2001 in a way that is positive and free of political exploitation....
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Notes from a Polite New Yorker: Graceland Too

Everyone who had been described it to me as a very weird experience that words could not do justice, and they were right. ...
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Notes from a Polite New Yorker: Getting Gay for Marriage

As it is part of the government's responsibility to make sure all of its citizens are treated equally under the law, gay marriage is just. ...
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Notes From A Polite New Yorker: Farewell to a Brilliant Jackass

Ryan Dunn of "Jackass" brought laughter to a generation that had grown cynical and helped change television for the better. ...
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Notes from a Polite New Yorker: Vegas Baby! Part II

The Polite New Yorker explores Sin City...
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Notes from a Polite New Yorker: Vegas, Baby! Part I

The Polite New Yorker explores Sin City...
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Notes From A Polite New Yorker: The Discontent of Our Winter

The New York City area got a big blizzard of snow beginning the night after Christmas. We haven't seen a day without snow on the ground since. ...
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Notes from a Polite New Yorker: Saying Goodbye to an Old Friend

There have been too many good times spent with the stuff, too many good memories forged with beer and whiskey to look upon them as anything but old friends. ...
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Notes from a Polite New Yorker: Independent Pro Wrestling - Best Sport Ever

In New York, the independent pro wrestling show provides the best value for your sports dollar....
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Notes From a Polite New Yorker: Things To Do Before You Leave New York

New York attracts people from all over the world. They come to New York with a variety of dreams and ambitions. Many eventually leave. ...
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Notes From a Polite New Yorker: One Year On

It has been a year since the world lost Russell Lewis and Elizabeth Quilliam. Neither one was a blood relation, but I lost two members of a larger extended family. ...
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Notes From A Polite New Yorker: Sword Of Damocles

If you have a job today, you are lucky. If you can still afford your mortgage or the rent on your apartment, you are lucky. ...
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Notes From A Polite New Yorker: Trust Me, I'm An Expert

Where we go wrong is putting blind faith in experts....
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Notes from a Polite New Yorker: A Yankee In New Orleans, Part II

Polite New Yorker continues his journey through New Orleans. ...
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Notes From a Polite New Yorker: Captive Audience

If you ride the New York City subways with any regularity, you will be subjected to appeals for alms, sermons and dance and musical recitals whether you want to or not......
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Notes From A Polite New Yorker: Built By Ruth, Destroyed By Greed

What is most tragic about this is that so many Yankee fans seem perfectly content to watch their history being pissed away so the Steinbrenners can pocket more cash at the city’s expense. ...
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Confession of an Upper Decker

NOTE: I received the article below from an author I respect who has asked to remain nameless. I offer this for publication so that the...
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Shady and the Atomic Star Monkey

They had had a rough trip; they weren't on speaking terms when they drove through Kansas. They cracked open a few beers. They combed their long hair over their faces, put on sunglasses and hats, and posed for a picture with my cat. It was a happy day....
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Vive le France

The French think Americans are ignorant and boorish. Americans think the French are effete snobs. We're both right....
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Profiling, Racial and Otherwise

The officers informed me and my fellow detainee that we fit the description of two assault suspects....
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This New Yorker Hits the Road, Part III

Banditos, bratwurst, and brushing off the retarded in Wisconsin's capitol....
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A San Francisco Christmas

After the third song, eXtreme Elvis burst from a large gift on a separate stage. He was wearing his usual white rhinestone-studded jumpsuit and a Santa hat. He orked his way around the bar singing various Elvis and holiday songs....
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Experts Agree: My Grandmother Is the Greatest

The name Mary Sheahan stands for selfless dedication to family....
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A New York Yankee in George Bush's America

It doesn't matter that tax dollars are going to politically connected contractors while military families starve and scrape; George W. Bush struts around in a flight suit and says he loves Jesus....
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